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Who do you want to work with over the long haul? Is there anything about the relationship that can stand out to you? Everything being equal... the relationship and professionalism should win your business.
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I'm actually going to take issue with this. Not you specifically, but rather with Marv and Ben.
There is a lot that can be reviewed by looking at illustrations and while the numbers may bounce around a bit, there are functional pieces to policies that are way easier to recapitulate with an illustration and quantify their effect on the policy vs. other options.
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As for the original question, mutuals are not "better." There are career sales agents who work for those mutual companies (whose job it is to sell the companies' insurance products) who would have you believe that mutuals are better. And there is no doubt that mutuals themselves think that they are better. But being mutual does not make you superior simply because you are a mutual.
As far as your comparison goes. MetLife isn't a bad whole life carrier at all. And they compete against the companies you listed (and several others) all the time.
Now, functionally there are a lot of things you can do with Guardian that you cannot do with MetLife (nor really with NYL). And those features that would be unique to Guardian could give them a serious advantage. And Guardian isn't the only company that has such advantages.
But ultimately no, Guardian and NYL are not superior just because they are mutuals and MetLife can certainly compete with them.
I was introduced to the Blease Reports last year. I do not know if those reports are still available